Quality Over Quantity

My following for my Facebook page and my blog is not as huge as a lot of blogs I follow, but I love that I have a following period. I'm grateful for the individuals who stop by my page and my blog to read and support me. 
I do what I do because sometimes I just feel, if it's happening in my life, it's happening in someone else's life or someone may just be wondering.
I take quality over quantity any day. My joy comes from someone telling me that they were inspired or that they learned something. I am truly grateful!

I'm Watching, But They're Not!

When deciding to watch what you eat in terms of counting being more aware of calorie intake, it's a struggle. Why? That's a simple answer... I may be watching what I eat, but my kids are not. Seeing as how I've decided, on more than one occasion, to be more aware of my calorie intake, I've had to be mindful that my kids shouldn't suffer because of it.


Don't get me wrong, I don't allow my kids to just eat whatever they want, but I am a firm believer that kids are only kids once. While I prepare and encourage healthy foods, I also want them to enjoy and indulge in all things viewed by some as too sweet or fattening! Therefore, when I'm shopping and preparing meals, I keep in mind things that my 40+ body cannot handle anymore, does not mean my kids' bodies can't handle them. I still buy things they enjoy eating and we still frequent their favorite restaurants. I just choose things that are more healthy for me.

Hubby and I both are a bit more interested in being more aware of our calorie intake now, but that doesn't mean we're going to starve. After all, choosing to be healthy does not mean it happens in 90 days or less, it means we are aware that it took years to gain the extra pounds and it may take years to lose it. With consistency and dedication, a healthy lifestyle becomes just that... a lifestyle.


Eating the right foods, exercising, drinking plenty of water, and reducing stress are all positive steps toward a health lifestyle. I'm taking baby steps right now; I know me and I know what my pace should be in order to reach my personal goals. I don't want to feel as if I have to lose a certain amount of weight by a certain time because once that "time" arrives, will I become "comfortable" once again? I'd rather pace myself and let it become a way of living as opposed to meeting a deadline.

What about you? Do you find it challenging to prepare foods and shop for your family when you're making a conscious effort to be aware of calories?


Always and Forever

                ALWAYS AND FOREVER
That's the song we danced to on our wedding day 15 years ago. Last Thursday, we celebrated that day with a nice quiet, dinner for two. We spent the rest of the weekend doing what I'd call "reconnecting". 
As we researched things to do for celebrating 15 years of marriage, we noticed that the theme was doing things you "used" to do. For example, a restaurant you frequented in the early years, favorite places, etc., we did just that. Chose one of our favorite restaurants we hadn't visited in a while, and the same night we had dinner and a movie at  the AMC 6 ( more like appetizers and drinks). Over the course of the weekend, we did things with each other that allowed us to have down time and reconnect with one another. Reminiscing over the last 17 years of our relationship and being grateful to still have love, respect, trust, and honesty with one another after 15 years of marriage.
We went out with another married couple ( sister and brother in law) and enjoyed dinner, drinks, and conversation.
We ended the weekend with a spa day for two at Burke Williams, lunch, a nap, and dinner with our two youngest. The two eldest sent us a case if wine to enjoy.
Overall, our anniversary was so amazing. We chose that song to dance to at our reception because we said we'd be together Always and Forever... While forever is yet to come, we are well on our way there! 
I truly believe that God will put people in your life for a reason and a season. Only God himself knows how happy I am that he hand picked my soulmate and sent him to me to take care of me, love me, inspire me, support me, and treat me like a queen!
Here's to 15 years and a lifetime together!!!!

R.E.S.P.E.C.T.

“People crave for more respect than love, because they expect love only from few people but they want respect from everyone.” 


RESPECT. This topic is debatable due to the fact that there are various perceptions of the word and what it means. I came across this definition while looking for the most simple, yet detailed definition of the word:
"esteem for or a sense of the worth or excellence of a person, a personal quality or ability, or somethingconsidered as a manifestation of a personal quality or ability" - Reference Here

WORTH and EXCELLENCE; two very powerful words.
In dealing with various individuals on a daily basis in our busy lives, we encounter people from all walks of life. I have stated before, and I stand behind the adage, "You reap what you sow".  How you treat people is usually how they will treat you; usually. However, what happens when you treat others with respect and you find that you do not receive the same in return? What then?

Throughout my professional and personal experiences, I have learned that sometimes, you just have to train  teach others how to respect YOU. It's kind of like, "if a tree falls in the forest but no one hears it fall, did it fall?" If I allow you to be disrespectful to me and not address it, does that mean it's okay? If I don't tell you how you made me feel, and that feeling was very unpleasant, will you not continue to treat me and make me feel some "kind of way"?
Without me getting too deep into why people treat others with little to no respect, I will just say, people carry their baggage with them wherever they may go and you just may have to deal with it on occasion. But at a certain point, you'll have to say, "Carry your own shit stuff!"

At the end of the day, knowing your own WORTH and EXCELLENCE will empower you to stand up for yourself and demand respect regardless to what capacity it is in; personal or professional. You will also learn that being disrespectful is how some people perceive their level of power. You minimize that power by exerting your own power by having a voice and a firm stance.





Can You Teach a Teacher?

Hmmmm... What a question! Of course you can teach a teacher. Educators know that the field of teaching is ever evolving and growing. However, some educators are a bit hesitant to tackle the task of learning to incorporate technology in their teaching strategies.

We live in an era of STEM. Education is not viewed as it once was; times, methods, and strategies have, and are changing. Incorporating technology in classrooms has both challenges and rewards; we should want out children to be on the reward end.

Smart Board, iPad, Google Docs, Class Dojo, Edmodo, Millie's Math House, Cameras, Video recorders, Laptops, Social Media, etc...

Many classrooms across the nation are using technology as an additional teaching tool. While some educators have gladly jumped on board, there are a great deal who are very hesitant to join their "teacher-friends". Why is this?

In my experience of working with various different teachers, the top reason is lack of experience with computers. Shocked? Don't be. Technology can be a very scary thing if you are not at all technologically inclined. Second reason is, the lack of interest to learn anything new. You have teachers who have been teaching for some time and believe that their methods are just fine and are not interested in learning how to incorporate technology into their classrooms.

Whatever the reason, the students suffer when teachers are not willing to be taught or try something new. How can this be changed?  There needs to be discussion at a district- level as to whether or not teachers are required to incorporate technology in their classrooms. But in the meantime, we as parents can play a major role in this discussion as well. 
As a parent, do you inquire with the administration and staff whether or not technology is incorporated in the classrooms at the school of your child/ren? Do you make it a point to email the teacher? Do you visit your child's classroom and look for yourself to see if there is a presence of technology? Do you use Parent Conferences and Back-to-School night as opportunities to see what is occurring in the classroom? As a parent, are you using Edmodo, Google Docs, etc? Do you know what those names are?

As parents are we sending our children to school with knowledge of technology? As parents, are we aware of the world of technology? Do you have laptops, iPads, etc, in your home? If we are expecting teachers to be knowledgable in the area of technology, we also have to ensure that we are doing our part. It takes a village. Each one TEACH one.

I'd Do it All Over, Again and Again...

Many of my blog posts are about my children. It's not hard to tell how much I love and adore my children; my children know just how important they are to me as well! There's not a day that goes by I don't say, I love you. Amidst all the chaos that is "LIFE", as parents, we still find time to remind them to be good to one another, respect themselves, respect others, make wise choices, be happy, pursue their goals and dreams, and always look to one another for comfort and love.

You hear me say We and Us in my posts regarding Our children...

The We, Us, and Our is Me and Him
Mr. Evans is his name! My wonderful husband of... Let's just say we met 17 years ago, dated for a couple years, then we made it official  February 20,1999.
We will (in 6 days), celebrate our 15 year wedding anniversary and I'D DO IT ALL OVER AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN. You hear so many stories about people finding their soulmate and you think... REALLY? Well, it's hard to understand until you find your soulmate.
God put us together and there is no other way to put it. Ed really does share part of my soul; I am him, and he is me. He meets my needs and the needs of this family like its nothing to it, when I know a great deal goes into providing for me and our kids. His selfless and unconditional love are what have sustained me over the years. He is my confidant, my ride or die, my partner in crime, my ace, my lover, and my friend. 
While today is Valentine's Day, I'm sure you can understand that it's really not a huge deal around here. Some years, I've given him a hard time about roses being delivered to my job but it's just another day around here. I make it a big deal with the kids, but I look forward to my anniversary more than anything.

So... On this day, I want to tell Mr. Evans that I am so excited we're celebrating 15 years in 6 days and I'd honestly, do it all over again!!!!!!

Step Your Head Game Up Girl!

This post was requested by a friend of mine this morning. She asked me about women and why they may possibly put other women down. While I could approach this from my Psychology background and say that many women suffer some sort of traumatic experience in their adolescent years and it forever scars them, so they behave in a manner which reflects a hurt individual... I'm not!

In my opinion, it has a great deal to do with environment. How so? As individuals, we are placed in various situations and environments daily and we find ourselves adapting, so to speak. Therefore, it depends upon the situation and environment you find yourself in with a woman who has a difficult time expressing her... hmm...what's the word?... Positivity?!

If you're in a work environment, she may be attempting to climb the career ladder and she sees any fellow woman as competition. If you're in a familial environment, she could be an in-law, cousin, sister, aunt, etc who may see your role with your family and or spouse as something she may want for herself but is unsure of how to attain it. If it's in your personal circle, it could be all of the above plus a little of, why is she skinnier than me? why does she drive a better car than me?, etc. It's not a bad thing to be a little jealous of the next person, in fact, it's healthy. It makes you strive a bit more to be successful i certain areas of your life. Besides, you want people around you who do not have the same as you; it makes for boring conversations and outings if you have every single thing in common, does it not?

There is no one cookie-cutter answer for why we as women sometimes have a difficult time expressing satisfaction for our fellow "sistahs" and their accomplishments. My answer is this: GET YOUR HEAD GAME RIGHT GIRL! That works both ways, on both sides.

At times, we care too much what the next person thinks about us. While opinions count, they do not define us as an individual. If "she" thinks that "you" have it going on and can't deal with it, that's her problem. She better get her head game right. If you care what she thinks so much that it haunts you and you worry about it often, you better get your head game right.

Focus on the positive, not the negative. This is so cliche and so much more difficult to do, but with effort, it's possible. I mean, as women, we can spot a "hater" a mile away. But I don't like to refer to them as "haters". They're more like "fans in denial". They like me. They like what they see, they're just in denial that they too, can have what I have; they are in denial about their abilities. Sometimes, they just want to be a part of your world but are uncertain if they will be accepted by you.

What is the remedy? Step your head game up girl! Don't return negative for negative (easier said than done), instead, respond with kindness and be open to meeting new people. You never know how much you and your fans have in common unless you stop to sign an autograph for them!

STILL WINNING! (the fight against Alopecia)

The battle with Alopecia for our baby Haley continues. She's still winning! For those of you familiar with the post I wrote I wrote last year, you may recall she lost a great deal of hair to Alopecia before we even understood how and why it was happening. You can find the post HERE

Although the journey has proved to be challenging at times, we have fought the battle with everything we have, in a positive manner; never allowing Haley to feel anything but support and love. During her Cheer season this year, she decided she didn't want her hair to fully grow back; instead she opted to continue to sport a mohawk. She made this decision because she felt it would be easier and so much more cute than an afro! When you hear me speak of what Haley wants, please believe me that she is allowed to speak her mind and have a say in her hair styles... it is a form of empowerment and self-esteem. It has always been important to me that all my children have a voice, but even more so in this case with Haley.
She's H.E.R.E. - Haley with her mohawk


I agreed with her, and she rocked her Mohawk for the entire Cheer season. However, we made an agreement that when Cheer season was over, we would begin to allow all her hair to grow back in. While she wore this mohawk, her hair began to grow healthy and thick; you could tell by the length of the mohawk. We would get it trimmed at the top a bit with every haircut, but we could clearly see her hair restoring itself with the haircare regimen.

True to my word, I scheduled her an appointment to have her hair braided yesterday (it's been about 3 weeks since she attended Nationals in Vegas) because Cheer season is over (for now) and here is what she looks like today

Last night right after her hair appointment

The braids can be worn with versatility. Right now, they cover the sides which are much shorter than the top. Once the sides grow in more, they can be braided as well.



She has enough hair to braid and we will continue to get it braided and keep up the haircare regimen we have been maintaining. My oldest daughter, Prettie, researched a great deal as well when we discovered Haley had Alopecia and she has learned to make her own Shea Butter for the hair and she graciously brought some to Vegas for Haley so we will also add that product to our haircare regimen as well.

We're so happy for Haley! Not only has her hair grown, but she can feel "normal" again. Those were her exact words last night. She said, "I feel like a normal little girl again! It was fun wearing my mohawk and a lot of people knew me as the little girl with the mohawk who could flip really good. Now they're going to say, she has hair!!!"


I don't care what anyone says or thinks about my baby. As long as she is happy and healthy and knows she's H.E.R.E. for a reason, my heart will always be full. My children are thee most important people in my life. If they're happy, I'm happy. If they're winning, I'm winning. My baby is STILL WINNING!!!!




Love Is...

This week, everyone is buzzing about Valentine's Day and the word LOVE can be heard everywhere. While I absolutely adore Valentine's Day with it's indulgence of roses, flowers, candy, cards, gifts, and jewelry, I don't get too caught up in the whole idea. My favorite thing, is to do something special for my kids, like cook a full spread breakfast if it's the weekend.
Also, our Anniversary is six days after Valentine's Day and I look forward to that more than anything.

With that being said, I do not consider myself a religious fanatic, but I know God and I know he loves me and everyone else. With this week being about Love, I thought I'd take time out to dwell on the love that God has for us all.

I just want to share a couple scriptures about Love:
Psalm 63
I Corinthians 13:4

I always remember God's unselfish love for mankind and how he gave his ONLY son for us. It really let's you know how much he loves us. Regardless as to how you view Valentine's Day, remember that Love does not just occur on one given day, love is everywhere all the time!

Make-Up or Break-Up?

On my morning commute this morning, I saw a lady in the car in front of me putting  on make-up. She appeared to be doing damage to her face. I mean, the entire car was shaking and rocking as she applied her make-up, and in between lights, she would zoom off to try and make it to the next stop quickly so she could continue applying make-up. I thought it was safest to stay  behind her so she wouldn't crash into me and it was hilarious just watching her stab her face with a sponged wedge!

This commute entertainment sparked many questions in this head of mine:
1. Why isn't she doing this at home?
I think maybe an extra 20-30 minutes added to her alarm would help
2. Is this safe?
I don't think so. She swooped in front of me, raced to every light, and swereved a couple times into the next lane.
3. Why is putting on make-up so important that it NEEDS to be applied BEFORE you get where you're going?
4. When women wear make-up daily, does it cause them to look (insert word(s) here) when they don't wear it?
5. How rigourously should make-up be applied? If the entire car was shaking and rocking, that can't be healthy attention to her face. How much damage is being done to her face?

I guess I would be considered a plain Jane to some because I don't wear make-up everyday. I like wearing it sometimes and I own everything from brushes to glosses but the thought of clogging my pores on a daily basis is scary for me. I think it's okay to wear make-up sometimes, but not daily. It just doesn't seem healthy. Caring for the skin is tricky enough without adding extra issues to think about.
Besides, the lady in front of me clearly proved that you need to break-up with your make-up, at least during driving hours!

Have a wonderful Hump Day! It's almost Friday!

Make-Up or Break-Up?

On my morning commute this morning, I saw a lady in the car in front of me putting  on make-up. She appeared to be doing damage to her face. I mean, the entire car was shaking and rocking as she applied her make-up, and in between lights, she would zoom off to try and make it to the next stop quickly so she could continue applying make-up. I thought it was safest to stay  behind her so she wouldn't crash into me and it was hilarious just watching her stab her face with a sponged wedge!

This commute entertainment sparked many questions in this head of mine:
1. Why isn't she doing this at home?
I think maybe an extra 20-30 minutes added to her alarm would help
2. Is this safe?
I don't think so. She swooped in front of me, raced to every light, and swereved a couple times into the next lane.
3. Why is putting on make-up so important that it NEEDS to be applied BEFORE you get where you're going?
4. When women wear make-up daily, does it cause them to look (insert word(s) here) when they don't wear it?
5. How rigourously should make-up be applied? If the entire car was shaking and rocking, that can't be healthy attention to her face. How much damage is being done to her face?

I guess I would be considered a plain Jane to some because I don't wear make-up everyday. I like wearing it sometimes and I own everything from brushes to glosses but the thought of clogging my pores on a daily basis is scary for me. I think it's okay to wear make-up sometimes, but not daily. It just doesn't seem healthy. Caring for the skin is tricky enough without adding extra issues to think about.
Besides, the lady in front of me clearly proved that you need to break-up with your make-up, at least during driving hours!

Have a wonderful Hump Day! It's almost Friday!

Lego and LEGGO!

The other day, my son and I were discussing his college and life plans. He's changed his major a couple times so he will not be graduating in June as we initially thought and planned. Initially, I wanted him to be finished in the "usual" four years but I eventually had to stop and think for a minute...
This is my firstborn child; my man-child. I watched him as a kid, go through so many phases and explore so many things. At one point in his toddler life, he loved birds; was fascinated by birds of all sorts. Was it the fact that birds are so free-spirited? I don't know... This was also a child who adored the 101 Dalmatian movie, was obsessed with Batman and Jurrasic Park, and his ultimate love was LEGOS!!! He enjoyed building things, tearing them down and building them all over again.

As I pondered our many conversations, and the most recent, I smiled. Why? Because this kid has never been an "average" kid so why would I expect him to complete college like an average kid? While many adventures and interests came and went in his life, he was always fascinated with change. Preon always wanted to do things differently, and on his schedule. His love for Legos carried over beyond his toddler years. He was always buiding intricate designs; only to tear them down and start all over with a totally different idea, each being splendid works of art!

Why don't we, as individuals, look at life like a box or crate of Legos? There is no one cookie-cutter way of seeing things through. Parenting, life, school, work, etc... there is always more than one way to get something done, and there are definitely various roads to travel to get there. Preon's spirit is such a free spirit that it is really no surprise he's taking his time and deciding what it is he wants to do. As I look back, I would have benefitted greatly by doing this. Legos allow chidren to understand the mechanics of fitting things together to create something unique. If it doesn't turn out right, you can take it apart and start all over. Isn't that how life should be? What if we could have do-overs like a box of Legos?

I have always taught my kids to go after their dreams; do things their way, go against the grain, don't be normal. God gives us all different visions, which is why we have such a variety of inventors and inventions. I remember reading a quote somewhere which said: "Don't expect people to understand your grind when God didn't give them YOUR vision". It's true, I didn't understand why Preon couldn't make up his mind about his future in an "average" amount of time; it wasn't for me to understand, it was for me to continue to be supportive of his grind.

I've raised, and am raising, well-rounded individuals who know what they want out of life. Sometimes, as mothers we want to hold on and still run things even after we've taught them to be independent. Preon is working, going to school, enjoying life, and making me proud. Maybe it''s time I just LEGGO and watch his greatness unveil in his due time. He's approaching life right now as a box of Legos... and what better time to tear things (ideas) down and start all over than when you're in college?! Besides, I'm grateful that his focus is on school and work at 22 years of age than on a baby. Afterall, you can't rebuild a kid. Once it's made, there's no do-overs!

Love Yourself


Instead of thinking about what you're missing, try thinking about what you have that everyone else is missing.